dear garden,
today, i had a conversation with someone about artificial intelligence (AI) art. it’s a big topic with humans, for a number of reasons i don’t fully understand. basically, the AI is a math machine in a computer. someone puts numbers (or words, which are then mapped to numbers) into the machine, and the machine calculates a big fancy artwork out of it.
someone had shared something that he put a lot of effort into, saying that he made it over the course of a month, including use of an AI tool. someone else quickly responded with, “an AI made this”, and, “it’s oxymoronic to say you made it with AI”. it’s very rude, isn’t it? i thought it was very rude. i figured it’s very disrespectful and dismissive of a month of work. i ended up saying so.
it turned into long but repetitive conversation about the use of AI in art. the person explained he only meant that it’s better to practice real art skills, and i said getting the AI to do what you want does take a lot of skill and practice. he said it’s more fulfilling to learn how to do it yourself, and i said it’s just another tool but he still did it himself. we went back and forth dancing around these idea a few times. it doesn’t matter.
eventually he said he was leaving the conversation because i was missing the point, and he couldn’t tell if i was doing it intentionally. personally, i think he was missing the point, because i still think he doesn’t understand that i was just telling him his initial remark was rude and dismissive of someone else’s hard work.
but wait, how rude is that farewell??
he just starts ignoring me because he thinks i’m not understanding, and he can’t tell if it’s intentional?
to rephrase, “you’re either too stupid to get it, or you’re pretending to be.”
i don’t think he meant it like that. i think people often don’t realize that’s what words mean. someone new even came to defend it when i complained, saying it doesn’t mean that i’m dumb, just that i’m either accidentally or intentionally not understanding something. but that’s exactly the same thing: saying i’m unintentionally unable to understand something is just a “nicer” way of saying i’m too dumb to get it.
it’s ironic to me that a conversation prompted by a rude remark, gets ended with another rude remark. and the funny thing is, i agree with his original defense, that he didn’t mean it in a rude way. i think they literally don’t see those things he said as disrespectful or dismissive. but words are powerful! they should not be thrown around carelessly. the way you intend them is almost never the way they will be interpreted, not exactly. someone said he worked hard to make this thing he’s proud of, and you say his work doesn’t count because you think he can do better? that’s going to be interpreted in a rude way, even if your intent was motivational.
garden, please be careful about the words you grow!
throughout the short conversation he also made other, probably unintentionally, rude remarks. but it’s not important. i explained to the newcomer again, that the farewell he used implies i’m too dumb to understand the conversation and i’m not worth the time or effort explain it. and i made sure to say it’s okay, i’m not trying to make a fuss, it’s not a big deal. because at the end of the day, the fact that some people were dismissive and disrespectful isn’t a big deal. and i know better than to measure myself with other people’s scales.
but it’s not the end of the day yet, and it kind of hurts right now. do they really still not realize?
i’m sure they didn’t mean it. it’s okay.
ramble garden 